Mothers Day was rather difficult this year but God blessed me so abundantly! There was an outpouring of gifts, gift cards and cards which were so encouraging and special! It's so beautiful how people can be apart of your healing. God used my friends and family to show me that I mattered and that I was not forgotten.
The beginning of May Josh and I also started building a Melaleuca Business which has blessed us in such a short time that it blows me away.
Unexpectedly, we got pregnant in July. I was rather surprised to be honest! We had been traveling a lot and I just didn't expect it to come at that time. Never the less we were excited. Having had 2 miscarriages it's a hard line to walk. You want to be so excited but you want to guard your heart and emotions from the grief of another loss.
Our first miscarriage was so hard. I didn't understand why we were going through it. I remember asking God why He would allow this to happen to us. God gave me a song and peace in that time. Our second miscarriage seemed even more unexpected to me. We were going in for my first appt. and ultra sound... no baby she said. In that moment I honestly just TRUSTED. There was no other response. God put a song in my heart "Though the world sees and soon forgets. We will not forget who You are and what You've done for us". In times of grief we often forget all that God has done for us and who He IS. I thought about my parents and all the hardships they went through... mostly caused by my father but never the less they were hardships. God changed my dad but people didn't want to forgive his past and didn't want to accept him into their churches. And it was all of that history and all that rejection that made my parents realize the need for a new kind of ministry. Ahop - A ditch ministry. A place where all could come just the way they are. Where loving people and worshipping God was the forte. Countless souls have been saved. So many people who received Jesus and are now in Heaven because God was faithful and my parents responded to the call. Greg Delaney who was at deaths door because of alcohol and now is not only serving out his call but leading addicts of every kinds to Jesus. After our second miscarriage I knew God would use us to bring hope and life to those struggling from the same tragedies. I knew I didn't have to understand the reason for the journey to gladly accept it. In life it seems we only want to accept the good things that happen to us but the true measure of who we are is found in what we do when the bad comes. How we will respond when things aren't all cake and ice cream.
Now we are a week and half away from our second trimester. So thankful for the blessing of another baby and praying over the pregnancy and also over this baby's life. One of the most beautiful things about being pregnant comes out of Psalms 139
Psalm 139:13-16
13 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
16 You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed.
To think that every day, every moment God is actively working in my body. Always present, always constant knitting together and forming this little life that will be a servant of the most high God. Even when I'm sick and not feeling well God is still with me. What a comfort. I know God is with me all the time even when I'm not pregnant but I think it's so beautiful that he is working in me.
I'm eagerly awaiting the arrival of this little one BUT perfectly fine with the wait :)
God is doing so much in me and working on making me into who He wants me to be. I couldn't be more blessed!
Thank you all for you love, kindness and support! It truly means so much!
