Edith Brooks

What kind of woman was Edith Brooks?  I will tell you the truth, there have not been words invented that express the greatness of this woman.  She loved God with her whole being and she loved others with an unconditional force.  She was strong in her beliefs but didn't force them on others.  She respected people and because of that pure and honest respect she earned more respect than some Presidents ever receive!   The impact of her life for the kingdom of God is great!  Thousands upon thousands upon thousands were directly affected by my grandmother and her life long sweetheart, Bruce Brooks.  From those thousand many more thousands have been affected and from those are even more thousands.  If only I could see through God's eyes I would see the MASS amounts of people who not only serve him but continue in Kingdom work because of the influence of my grandparents.  Every single Kingdom impact that I will ever make is because of them for I am here because they found love in each other and decided to build on that love.  She may not be walking on this earth now but her legacy will live on!  It will move forward forcefully for we are the carriers of that legacy!  During the last week of her life her only concern was the salvation of her family, neighbors and loved ones.  She cared not for anything else other than meeting us all on the other side.  It was our honor and privilege to care for her the last couple weeks.  Of all human beings that I have ever knows THIS woman deserved so much more than we could even give.
Early this morning we knew her time was coming to an end and we gathered around her bed to sing hymns.  She always wanted to pass in her sleep and God honored that request.  It was a beautiful, peaceful passing that I only thought happens in the movies.  After she took that last breath my aunt came in and sat down to read a letter that my grandmother had written to her children.  As Sue read this letter and we looked at her outer earthly shell I became even more overwhelmed by her greatness.  The letter was eloquent  and moving!  She not only had a letter to be read to all her children but she had written a letter to each of them individually.  WOW.  Who gets this?!?!  It was like even in her passing she was prepared to KEEP giving to her loved ones.  Caring for them in their grief and making sure that they would have something in hand to keep and read anytime they wanted to remember her loving and wise words!
I have a sense of complete gratefulness and awe at how God let things unfold in her passing.  If ever there was a PERFECT passing this would be it!  At her side till the end!
My grandparents both had one desire.  To serve God and serve him only and to love people and put them before yourself.  They dedicated their lives to the will and purpose of God.  I am honored to be theirs!  Honored to have their blood coursing through my veins!  

Bruce Brooks passed on July 30, 1995 followed by Edith Brooks on March 23, 2011

Motives

In everything in life we must question our motives.  WHY are we doing, saying and acting the way that we are.  This is a proactive internal search.  If our motives (as christians) are not something that Jesus would do then WHY do it? I'm finding that most people don't really care about their motives and therefore do and say foolish things that dishonor God.  I don't think they mean to do this it just happens by the LACK of self exploration.  Proverbs talks about to much talk leads to sin.  Think before you speak.  It also says it's better to come upon a mother bear robbed of her cubs than to confront a foolish person caught in foolishness.  Cast not your pearls before swine.  Which basically means don't waste what is holy on something that is unholy.  David says in Psalms, Search my heart God, and point out anything in me that offends you.  This is looking at ourselves every day and saying what can You change in me today God.  None of us are perfect! We are all in need of changing.  Only the foolish think they are wise.  Wise men and woman KNOW that it was with WISDOM that God laid the foundations of the earth.  No human being has wisdom in it's fullest for no one could humanly hold that.  God grants wisdom to those who revere Him.  He also exalts the HUMBLE and BRINGS DOWN the proud.  Today let us humble ourselves and know that we ALL are a work in progress needing and desiring MORE of our amazing God in our lives!! Let us not think better of ourselves that we ought but in ALL our ways let out lives shine the love and light of Jesus christ.  The author and finisher of our faith!

Thankful

Today has been an interesting day.  I went to bed late last night (around 5am) and then woke up early.  Got up and went to get some pie for my grandma since she isn't eating much I thought she might like something sweet... since when she does eat thats all she wants.  I got to her house around 11am.  She didn't seem to be doing that great but her color looked good.  Hospice was there getting her vitals and talking with the family.  I got to spend some time with my amazing grandma.  Brushed her hair, braided it, washed her face, put lotion on it.  Then she asked me to do something with her eyebrows. LOL.  She said she wanted me to wax them.  Then she proceeded to tell me some things.  She wants her blue dress, she wants debbie to do her hair to make it look full BUT not to big, she wants me to make her look pretty but not artificial.  At first I just thought she was kind of rambling but then I realized she was telling me what she wanted for her funeral.  Even in a time when she is barely making it she cares about what she looks like.  I guess the apple doesn't fall to far from the tree. :)  I sat there and looked at her in amazement.  She really is such an incredible  woman! She spends what energy she has to talk about the lord and to tell people about Jesus.  I want to be like her! As my aunt Linda and I carefully brought out EVERY blue dress she had in her closet she carefully assessed each one until she found the one she wanted.  What must that feel like?  I can't imagine.  Thinking your time is running out and you want to make last minute arrangements.  She has lived a life that honors God and been a true example of selfless love.  Even though her beliefs are strong and unwavering she never judges people.  That is the mark of true faith.  The mark of a wise woman who knows the key to the gospel is rooted in love and forgiveness! I am so thankful for her.
I'm going over to her house in the next 15 minutes for the 12am-3am shift.  I love just being in her presence and since I know her time is coming to an end on earth then I want to soak up every second with her.  Then I get to thinking, WHY didn't I come here more often! Why didn't I spend more time with her! I only live a couple blocks from her... I could have come by every day just to talk with her. Just to make sure she wasn't lonely but I was "busy".  I had "things" to do that "couldn't" wait.  Now I'm regretful!  Don't wait to soak up time with your loved ones! You never know when life is going to come to an end.  Last night on the other side of town and 19 year old boy was murdered.  I bet his parents or his siblings never thought that was going to be his last day.  We aren't guaranteed tomorrow... or even today for that matter.  Be thankful for your loved ones and cherish your time with them.  Be quick to seek peace because no argument or disagreement is worth it!

a first time for everything

It's 4:21am and I'm still awake :/ I haven't stayed up this late it a long time and I am blaming it on the Diet Dr. Pepper that I drank at about midnight. I started this blog for lots of reasons.  I like to talk/type and sometimes I have so much to say but no one to say it to (except God).  I just recently found out that I'm pregnant and we couldn't be more thrilled.  After losing a baby last year and going through the grief and pain of death this is a very sweet blessing!  My God is a faithful, wonderful, powerful God in whom I trust!  I don't always understand the reasons for the journey or see how He will use it for good BUT He always shows me! It's mind blowing to see His plans unfold!  You know those moments where you just know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are doing exactly what God wants you to be doing??? ... it's moments like that give us drive and motivation even in the hardest of times.  I'm in love with this King!  When I think about him my heart sings and my whole being desires more of Him! The commonly used song "Heart of Worship" has been coming up in my day to day life!  It's moving me to a place of pure adoration.  "When the music fades and all is stripped away and I simply come." Real life happens when the music fades and your stripped down to the nitty gritty.  "Longing just to bring something thats of worth that will bless your heart." This line gets me every time! I don't want to bring to God that which costs me nothing.  I want to bring Him my best.  My all! Something that is worthy of being laid before Him.  I don't want to give God what I want to give Him... I want to give Him what HE wants.  So many times we think about what WE want to give God.  Two years ago my husband bought be a gym membership for christmas. A GYM MEMBERSHIP. Like Really?!?! LOL!! He bought me that because thats what HE wanted.  He didn't think about what I wanted as a gift.  SO MANY times we do this with God.  We give Him what WE want to give and never once say "God what will bless your heart" God, what can I give you that pleases you because I desire to please you in every possible way! "I'll bring you more than a song for a song in it's self is not what you have required" <-- SO TRUE!  As a singer and worship leader sometimes you get caught up in "the songs" but He requires MORE. Daily living! "You search much deeper within, through the way things appear. Your looking into my heart"  We can't hide from God.  He knows us to the core and in one instance thats comforting but in another it can be scary!
"I'm coming back to the heart of worship and it's all about You. It's all about you Jesus" WORSHIP IS ALL ABOUT HIM!! Not us! "I'm sorry Lord for the thing I've made it and it's all about You, It's all about you Jesus"  I love when repentance is in a song!  Confessing that sometimes priorities get screwed up and things become about us instead of about our TOTALLY WORTHY KING!
"King of endless worth, no one could express how much you deserve" It's that the truth! His worth is immeasurable!! He deserves more than all humanity could give.  "Though I'm weak and poor, all I have is yours every single breath" When we look at our selves in the light of God we will always be weak and poor. His strength, power and richness is something our human minds can't even comprehend.  I mean even the streets in heaven are made of gold! THE STREETS!! Think about our streets! It honestly makes me laugh! He is so amazing and so majestic and yet He is mindful of us! He cares for us! His heart is towards us! CRAZY! I LOVE IT!!
I leave on this note, It's ALL about Him.  When we figure that out life is much easier.  You stop looking at things though selfish eyes.  Even in the trials you say "God, how can you use me in this situation? How can I make a difference for your Kingdom?  What would you have me do? " and don't be afraid to obey! It's the key to fulfillment!